When you sit around playing the waiting game your mind has a tendency to go places you really do not want to go to. You think about life,what you shoulda,coulda done differently. You think about death, how I would miss everyone,what their life would be like without me. I really try not to think about that part. Honestly that part causes me many sleepless nights. I am scared of dying. I am not ready to go now. I love my wife and kids so much that I do not want to miss a thing. I want to be there for my grandchildren,see the Grand Canyon, go to Alaska and so much more.At the end of the day and I beat all this crazy stuff going on with me I will come to the conclusion that my family is the greatest gift that God has ever given me. Life is not material. Life is in your heart, seeing those beautiful eyes everyday of my wife and kids calling me Dad.