Family is the key

Well it is now August 9th,my stent was taken out on the 7th and boy does that feel better.My physical well being is somewhat better,no more bladder spasms, they are finally gone.I still have doctors orders to take jt slow, no lifting running etc..Anybody who knows me knows I bend the rules a little bit....lol, but mostly I listen because I am not out of the woods yet.I still have that blocked valve in my heart,which does scare me just as much as the cancer did however as of this moment I am cancer free ,they did get ALL of it.In 6 months I go back and get a CT scan and more blood work.I will have to do this for about 2 years just to make sure it is kept in check.But anyway back to the heart,it does scare me but I have 1 of the best doctors in the area so I feel confident that all goes well.My blood pressure is running a little high but I have had only 3 episodes where I needed to take my Nitro. I go to the doctor on August 23rd to find out my options which are medications(blood thinners) or heart catherization  or surgery. As long as they fix it I do not care how they do it. I do know this I will win and I am going to be around a long time for my girls and my best wife any man could ever dream of having.Without my women in my life I would have not made it through all this.I LOVE YOU GIRLS........I LOVE YOU WIFEY ALWAYS AND FOREVER......XOXOXOXOXOXO

What a journey

It's been 15 days now since I've had my surgery.  I have some pain still but it's worth every bit of it to be cancer free.   I still have a few steri strips on my incisions they already took the staples out.  I have 5 incisions total.   I count the 3 smaller ones as 1 together since they are right in the same area.  The larger 4 incisions each had 4 staples.  So, I had 16 staples total.  I take my medication faithfully.  I feel myself getting stressed about my upcoming SSI Hearing and I can feel my chest hurt.  Now I'm having to learn the difference between my C.O.P.D & My Heart...  I take my inhaler first and wait a couple mins and if that don't help then I take my Nitro pill.  Usually the Nitro helps.  My blood pressure is getting better.  My wife makes sure all my medication is as easy as possible for me not to forget anything.  I am so grateful for having such a loving group of family and friends.  God Bless!

Feeling Better, Slowly but Surely

It has now been 3days cancer free and I'm feeling better every day, except when I try to do too much,then my kidney lets me know it.The staff at the Reading Hospital were for the most part very good and professional.The only thing is now I am cancer free for the moment but I have a 60% blockage in one of my heart valves(you only have 4 valves) and they won't physically open the valve until it is like75 to 78% blocked. To me might that not be too late in some cases. They want to start me on meds first so I will comply until I feel I need to get a second opinion. I just hope and pray the meds will work. It has been one hell of a bad year in some sense but we are WINNING. Anybody who knows me, my wife and girls know we are not quitters and we will beat all of this. God Bless.

Part 1 is complete..

....and do not believe every thing you read in the hospital brochures about procedures saying in 24 hours you will be feeling great.....wrong I was running a fever,had no appetite , peeing blood all day for the last 2 days,constipation, so in other words when the doctor called these are are normal , so do not always believe what literature they give you.I am ready to kill the cancer, though I know it is not going to be a pleasant recovering experience.....how ever I am going to be a cancer survivor and that means this minor set back of pain and being uncomfortable is a small price to pay for my life......Thank you all for your prayers and well wishes and most of all thank you God.

Nervous, Anxious, Ready

Nervous about the upcoming week, but, anxious and ready to get it done.  Monday I get my stent.   Then on Thursday July 12, 2012 I will have my Cryoablation surgery done.  It's a new procedure where the cancer cells are frozen, thawed, frozen and thawed again until all cancer cells are dead!  Then the next 2-5 years I will be closely monitored to insure that the cancer doesn't return.  If it does then I will have another surgery done called a "Wedge".   That's a whole different ball game that I hope I don't have to play.  But, if I do then I will.  I know I have a great support system of family and friends that will help me overcome any and every thing that comes my way.  As far as I know as of right now I will not have to undergo any Chemo or Radiation Therapy.  On July 12th I have to spend the night in the hospital, the first time non work related that I am separated from my wife and kids.  My wife will be there early the next morning to wait with me until I get my discharge papers to take me home on July 13, 2012.  I know my family will be happy to have me home as well as I will be happy to be home.  

another doctor, but not totally bad news

went to the eye doctor last night because I have been having trouble with seeing while driving,especially at. nightshe ran me through the full gamit of eye tests. She noticed I have the begining stages of cataracs Now she said it could take20 years to rear it's ugly head totally. In most cases it moves slowly so not to worry right know.That was finally good news for me on the medical front but she is going to keep a close eye(no pun intended)on me because sometimes it progresses quickly. Either way it is relatively an easy laser surgery.Well 16 days until they remove(or attempt to remove) my renal cell cancer.I CAN'T WAIT !!!!Then after that I have my ssd hearing in front of the judge in Harrisburg, PA. My lawer is trying to get me a video hearing because of me traveling that far in pain,either way is fine with me.Please everyone pray that ll goes well,I could really use your support.THANK YOU ALL FOR LISTENING AND PRAYING.........I WILL BEAT THIS CANCER AND I WILL WIN THIS CASE. Remember when i win it will be 2to 3 days when we make it to Fla.Thank You and look forward to meeting you all.(I will show you that all yanks aren't bad)lol
 

I really do not understand what happened here today but I am really hurt by the accusations of not being borderline gravely ill. another3 to 5 years I could have been gravely ill with no remission. People really need to do their homework,cancer any cancer is no simple cure ,it can come back with a vengence,it happens .I pray I AM GOING TO BE A SURVIVOR....AND I WILL.I have the best surgeon in pennysylvania so any nay sayers look it up
.Anyway I am stunned and very hurt that one of my best friends would do me like that.I hope youn can sleep well my son cause I Love You and all your hate towards me will change enough that.I hope someday we will see each, if not I am sorry for that,maybe God has a different path for us. I Love you

Happy Fathers day to me

This for me is probably the best Fathers Day to me ever.I feel more alive than I ever had before. Bottom line, I am alive and the prognosis is I will be for many ,many years to come Any men reading this please get your annual check ups.DO NOT PUT THEM OFF. All my stuff was found by accident. Please do not let this be you,get those check ups regulary. I do not mean in any way to be preaching about this. I was damn lucky to have a very good doctor who was on the ball.He has saved my life now twice because of his thoroughness and of course (my wife making me go when I had bronchitis).Any guys......HAPPY FATHERS DAY .Also to you dad HAPPY FATHERS DAY.....I miss you.  

Trusting the ones who love you

It is nice to wake up without stress, feeling good about myself and feeling confident about my prognosis and my future. Sure I am realistic theres  going to be a few bumps in the road, some physical pain but nothing I can not handle with God,my awesome family(all those below the Mason dickson line I include as my family also because you have accepted me as family...thanks by the way) and my friends,ex co workers like Dickie, Paul, John Shubeck(whom I need to call)and finnally Mickey @ Vickies Angel Walk who have helped us through the financial times.....I am really blessed that so many care about me. The thing i learned most about having cancer is you don't have to go through it alone,believe me  I have tried to go it alone and push people away but it ended up making me sadder and every one else too.Please anybody reading this take my advice
....YOU CAN'T DO THIS ALONE. Grow up and accept the people that love you to help, listen and be there for you. I WILL WIN, THANKS TO GOD AND MY FAMILY !!!!!!

Hallelujah!

Went to the new Urologist today and found out that I don't have to have my whole kidney taken out.   There's a new procedure where they can go in and freeze the cancer.. killing the cancer cells..

I'm so excited... and relieved at the same time.

Dr. Henry credentials , he went to the University of Pennsylvania Medical and Johns Hopkins University so I have the upmost confidence in his practice procedures. The procedure he is going to do is less than 5 years old but so far nothing but rave reviews. He said I am too young (thats right he said young...lol ) to have my whole kidney removed, stating that is the easy way out.Another procedure was to cut out the cancer and sew the rest of the kidney together, which he said was very painful and bloody and just as effective(96%) as the new procedure. Out of the 3 procedures I truly believe this is the right choice even though I will be in remission the next 5 years, closely monitored the first 2 years because it is a new procedure but in this case I do not mind being more or less a guinea  pig. I truly know this is the work of God. He totally steered us away from the quack who wanted to unnecessarily  take my whole kidney out to a doctor who thoroughly explained every thing in detail, and is very pleasant and confident about my case. I will beat this thanks to my new doctor who renewed my faith in the medical field(also Dr. Minnich, who saved my life twice now and Dr. Bell), so now I have 3 good doctors......and most of all a great wife ,beautiful and caring daughters,the best son a dad could want, my wonderful and supportive older sister and my younger brothers (whom I would like to see more often), but again my wife,who is also my best friend and the person I rely on the most to make me the man I am today,without her I just wouldn't be the person I am without her love and caring and sense of humor and so many other things(it would take me forever to name and express all my feelings about her). Let's not first and foremost forget God who gave me another chance at living a good life and putting all these great people in my life. I AM TRULY BLESSED.........   

Meltdown

Feeling very depressed today.Seem like everyone is dragging their feet.Doctors ,lawyers , angencies etc.who keep telling me to be patient. Well my patience is running so thin that I feel sick to my stomach.Yeah I have stage 1renal cell cancer of the kidney and it is not routine to do a full body cancer CT enhanced scan over my entire body.I do not mind them doing it but my gut feeling tells me(from what i read)there is concern about my whole renal system.i am not paranoid ,i actually and read this and my doctors were very vague talking to me  and said there are a couple of new players involved.Hopefully all will work out,medically and financially.What do I have to be crazy or lazy to get the money I worked for 36years.Hell may'be even dead before I get it.I appologize to family and friends,Im just having a little meltdown.LOVE YOU ALL

Starting to Understand

Well it has been a couple of days now am and I am starting to feel overwhelmed,See jt is not in my hands anymore ,which anybody who nows me I like to control destiny.I am not patient however I hope God is patient with me.I do know he will do right by me in his time, however sometimes it is not fast enough for me.Some how I will learn through his love and patience I will learn from him ,not because I have to but because I want to.He's given me my wonderful family and friends who truly love me and that is not because of who I am but because who he is. He will heal me so I can move on to do what he has planned for me.Talk to you later.

Biopsy Day

Well I had a biopsy on Wednesday.I had what it appears as the doctors called it a couple of new players showed up on the CT scan. He assured me they can be taken care with though I really do not know what he meant by new players and was pretty buzzed to fully understand but I will find out Friday from the main man(Dr. Daiber) and he will also see if my enlarged prostate is better. Yes I am scared but the doctor yesterday said we can fix all. I hope he is right.See you all in my next blog

Uplifting Phone Call

Today, Mickey from Vickies Walk called me to touch base with me on speaker phone to talk with the commitee. I really am still so amazed that these people I haven't even met care the way they do. Not only are they helping financially, but they are having an impact on me spiritually as well. They are truly a gift from above. They reassured me they are in this for the long haul. Thank you, Mickey and most of all thank you God for letting me let people help us. There was a time I would push people away(still do at times)but now I am learning there are alot of good people in this world. It is a learning process but I am a believer more than I am a skeptic.

Same ol,shit,Different Day(patience)

Feeling good for a damp and dreary Monday.Since the doc gave me pills for my depression I have noticed they seem to be working. The only thing wrong is the waiting game. Waiting for my S.S.D. appeal hearing, waiting for my oncology visit, waiting for my urology visit to see if my enlarged prostate has disappeared(kinda worried about that one),and finally my lung dr.visit because he will probably order a C.T. scan to see if my half inch spot on my lung has grown to the point that they will biopsy it.Other than all of that only my back is left but even though I have 4 buldging discs and it hurts ,that is the least of my worries. However everything goes I just have to be patient(anyone who knows me knows patience isn't one of my strong suits) and trust in God and my ever growing team of doctors. My wife and kids make it easier having their support. Thank you all for your prayers and encouragement and please keep on reading my blogs and also follow my wife through her own struggling journey.

God moved me

Today was a good a good day.We ,mostly momma worked hard in the yard.I cut 80% of the yard , and she cut the rest.I was exhausted. It sucks being sick and worn down,however I try and will continue to fight.Our yard is starting to look great.It takes time but worth it. Just the little things in life are starting to make me see how precious life truly is .I at 51 years of age am starting to realize life is great. You need money in life ,but it by far isn't everything.I have 6 kids I love so very much,yeah I am estranged from 1 of them , but I know God someday will allow us to make ammends to reach an understanding to communicate and possibly reach a father -daughter love for each other that we should have .And Jen if you ever read this I truly Love you and would love for you to forgive me.However if not,I am proud of what you have done with your life and you are in my heart forever,no matter what.Anyway I will continue to fight my cancer and my other medical conditions with vigor and courage. I am not a quitter and I will beat this because I have a support group that believes in me,but most of all I believe in myself and I know there is a GOD that loves me no matter of my past. I will not beat myself no longer,I've done that most of my life.I have learned to love and forgive me even if my outcome doesn't work out like I would like it to .I WILL WIN ,I have the lord who said I will  because he told me I will no matter what anybody thinks or says about me because I have grown up and I know who really runs the show and it is not me.Peace and please believe.

Feeling Better Slowly But Surely

Well it has been a while since I last blogged but I guess I kinda been out of it in self pity,wondering where God was,isolating in my room feeling depressed. I' ll be honest, when I found out about  cancer I got really scared and started to feel useless. My wife and kids were out doing yardwork while I just sit there watching. Needless to say it hurts. With my COPD certain days outside are just too hard for me to breathe. Bills piling up,depression(which I now take meds for) which seem to be working with aniexty also.Then my power steering went ,got behind on rent...ugggggg !Then by truly a miracle a group called Vickies Angel Walk came into my life.The man in charge named Mickey started a non-profit organization to help cancer patients with finanicial problems to stay above water.This organization is going to help us with rent every month until the gov't gets off their ass and grant me my S.S.D..Also they are fixing my car......that is mindblowing to us. True I don't like asking for help in anyway, shape or form but you can not say no to Gods wishes.That is exactly what this is ,a gift from above,there is no other explanation.Vickies will be having a cancer walk in October and I hope some of my family and friends will join in. It's a fundraiser to raise funds to help families in need. Let's face it,nobody is immune to cancer,I found out the hard way and it hurts your mind, body and soul.I think I am finally coming to terms with this slowly but surely.It takes time don't let anybody bullshit you about this.So please walk with us in October, whether you are a survivor, family of a survivor, friend or just care about cancer,because everybody in my opinion care about the #1 killer of our generation. Next I want to thank my awesome wife for being there(no matter how much of an ass I can be),my kids for making me laugh when I need it, my son for keeping my competitive juices going and my new neighbors Fred and Kristie for helping us while we are without a car til next week.Well thats all for now talk to you all soon. Also Patti don't worry I'll call you soon. Peace.

I feel bad I haven't blogged in a while... But, when I go through my scaredness and depression I make bad decisions. I haven't yet quit smoking.  I know I have to man up and do it.  But, my bad things I think about I want people to know that I truly do care about myself.  At times it may not seem like I don't but I do.  I care about my kids.  I want to be a winner.  I want to shed my problems.  It seems like lately financially it's one step forward and three steps back.  I had to ask an agency to help with the rent, that went well.. We were blessed by this agency.  Then my car the power steering pump went and now it's going to cost us from $300-$600 for labor and parts to fix.  Which we don't have the money to fix it and I have to travel for doctor appointments and one of those appointments if for a biopsy of my kidney.  This makes me depressed, upset and some days I don't even want to get out of bed.  Deep down inside I know everything will be ok.  But, I have a hard time believing it when it seems like it's one bad thing after another that happens.  I know I've done a lot of bad things in my life.  But, how long must I pay for it?  I need to get this biopsy done A.S.A.P!  The longer I have to wait obviously the worst my kidney gets.  At this point I'm at a loss and I don't know how I'm going to get through this.  Hopefully tomorrow Jesus will perform yet another miracle for us.  Because before I believed it he has helped.  I don't have the resources to travel up to 2 hours away from home just for doctor appointments.  My wife and kids have been stressed.  So I'm hoping sometime this week to get some money or something to get my car fixed for my appointments and for the co pays on my medications.  I am also hoping and praying that I get my appeal date very soon for social security.  It seems like no one is there when you need them.

Finally Some Hope

Well today I have gotten some good news. My blood tests were showing that my cancer is confined to just my right kidney. The mass is about 3/4 of an inch big.They are going to in the next couple of weeks to biopsy the mass and decide how much kidney they are going to remove. My urine test came back with a trace of blood in it but not to be alarmed about it.To me this is great news that all my medical issues are all caught early or stage 1. I am more fortunate than people like my mom because technology and doctors are more knowledgeable. Things go slower now days because of insurance, however the tortoise always beats the hare. Don't get me wrong I am still scared and I sill have a few serious medical issues to fight but as I said before I WILL WIN with the help of good doctors, my wonderful and beautiful wife(who won't let me even mention giving up) my great daughters and awesome son and most of all GOD who has changed my thought process on everything including that he has something in store for me.If he didn't he would just let me be.  I think he has delivered a message to me which I will share when the issues I have, become manageable and for me to follow through  with all the knowledge he has given me to share with others.

The Waiting Game(again as usual)

Well I guess with the holidays and all the waiting goes on.In all honesty just getting sick of being sick. I am tired of waiting for SSD to start up(even get my appeal hearing). Would just rather say the hell with everything and go back to working. Bills piling up, heck my settlement is going to all go to catch us up, which is fine however it doesn't help now.I guess patience(I do not know how much I have left) and praying is all I have. Just wish it would all go away and be normal again.

Well it has been 2 days now since I found out I most probably have cancer.Right now it's only an experts opinion viewing the scan,however he has seen thousands of scans and went on to tell us the findings are so. I would hope he is not that unprofessional to say such things out of turn. Anyway I am on day 2 of not smoking and so far so good, not many cravings,but I am sure some days are better than others. To those people reading and following along did you know that smoking is the #1 reason for kidney and bladder cancer ? I have to admit I'm numb and stunned about the findings.You would think I would not be but I am.Like I said I am not going to be stubborn and I am going to follow instructions. It is a matter of life and death.......

Either Way

Well here I am @6:48 am getting mentally prepared to go to my appointment. Today, hopefully I will get some answers. Either way it turns out, I will be ready for the next step. I will not be stubborn. I will comply with the doctors findings. Either way, I will have a new beginning. I WILL WIN !!!!!!!!!

When you sit around playing the waiting game your mind has a tendency to go places you really do not want to go to. You think about life,what you shoulda,coulda done differently. You think about death, how I would miss everyone,what their life would be like without me. I really try not to think about that part. Honestly that part causes me many sleepless nights. I am scared of dying. I am not ready to go now. I love my wife and kids so much that I do not want to miss a thing. I want to be there for my grandchildren,see the Grand Canyon, go to Alaska and so much more.At the end of the day and I beat all this crazy stuff going on with me I will come to the conclusion that my family is the greatest gift that God has ever given me. Life is not material. Life is in your heart, seeing those beautiful eyes everyday of my wife and kids calling me Dad.

This waiting really sucks.Sometimes I feel ready to go get em, like today. Only thing is waiting, as usual waiting for Pain MGMT doctors so I can work in my yard. I know i can only do a little at a time but a little everyday is better than nothing.Ready to say FTW, go back to work so I can take care of my family. I know I would have a hard time breathing but to me it is worth the sacrifice to provide for my family. I used to make good money and rarely had to say no to my girls. Now it seems like I have to say no all the time or wait until I get my SSD settlement,whenever the hell that is.It is one thing to break my own heart with what I have done to my body,  but to have included the ones I love and mean the world to me ,seems pretty selfish on my part. Does that mean I'd rather be alone....HELL NO. It just means I am a very lucky man to have them around to Love me the way I love them....Forever and Always til the end. I just have to be strong and not focus on the whys, the if's and why me. Most people do not have people in their life that I do. I wish I could keep telling my self that when I lay awake late at night feeling all alone, scared to sleep thinking I might not wake up.Hopefully ,the Lord willing he'll keep me around to see all my grandchildren and beyond.

Some treatments of COPD

It's not worth it!  You're lungs are valuable.

Do you know what you're doing to your body? I didn't!

Understanding COPD

Chronic obstructive pulmonary disease


COPD; Chronic obstructive airways disease; Chronic obstructive lung disease; Chronic bronchitis; Emphysema; Bronchitis - chronic






Chronic obstructive pulmonary disease (COPD) is one of the most common lung diseases. It makes it difficult to breathe. There are two main forms of COPD:


Chronic bronchitis, which involves a long-term cough with mucus


Emphysema, which involves destruction of the lungs over time


Most people with COPD have a combination of both conditions.

Causes, incidence, and risk factors


Smoking is the leading cause of COPD. The more a person smokes, the more likely that person will develop COPD. However, some people smoke for years and never get COPD.


In rare cases, nonsmokers who lack a protein called alpha-1 antitrypsin can develop emphysema.


Other risk factors for COPD are:


Exposure to certain gases or fumes in the workplace


Exposure to heavy amounts of secondhand smoke and pollution


Frequent use of cooking fire without proper ventilation

Symptoms


Cough, with or without mucus


Fatigue


Many respiratory infections


Shortness of breath (dyspnea) that gets worse with mild activity


Trouble catching one's breath


Wheezing


Because the symptoms of COPD develop slowly, some people may not know that they are sick.

Signs and tests


The best test for COPD is a lung function test called spirometry. This involves blowing out as hard as possible into a small machine that tests lung capacity. The results can be checked right away, and the test does not involve exercising, drawing blood, or exposure to radiation.


Using a stethoscope to listen to the lungs can also be helpful. However, sometimes the lungs sound normal even when COPD is present.


Pictures of the lungs (such as x-rays and CT scans) can be helpful, but sometimes look normal even when a person has COPD (especially chest x-ray).


Sometimes patients need to have a blood test (called arterial blood gas) to measure the amounts of oxygen and carbon dioxide in the blood.

Treatment


There is no cure for COPD. However, there are many things you can do to relieve symptoms and keep the disease from getting worse.


Persons with COPD MUST stop smoking. This is the best way to slow down the lung damage.


Medications used to treat COPD include:


Inhalers (bronchodilators) to open the airways, such as ipratropium (Atrovent), tiotropium (Spiriva), salmeterol (Serevent), formoterol (Foradil), or albuterol


Inhaled steroids to reduce lung inflammation


Anti-inflammatory medications such as montelukast (Singulair) and roflimulast are sometimes used


In severe cases or during flare-ups, you may need to receive:


Steroids by mouth or through a vein (intravenously)


Bronchodilators through a nebulizer


Oxygen therapy


Assistance during breathing from a machine (through a mask, BiPAP, or endotracheal tube)


Antibiotics are prescribed during symptom flare-ups, because infections can make COPD worse.


You may need oxygen therapy at home if you have a low level of oxygen in your blood.


Pulmonary rehabilitation does not cure the lung disease, but it can teach you to breathe in a different way so you can stay active. Exercise can help maintain muscle strength in the legs.


Walk to build up strength.


Ask the doctor or therapist how far to walk.


Slowly increase how far you walk.


Try not to talk when you walk if you get short of breath.


Use pursed lip breathing when breathing out (to empty your lungs before the next breath)


Things you can do to make it easier for yourself around the home include:


Avoiding very cold air


Making sure no one smokes in your home


Reducing air pollution by getting rid of fireplace smoke and other irritants


Eat a healthy diet with fish, poultry, or lean meat, as well as fruits and vegetables. If it is hard to keep your weight up, talk to a doctor or dietitian about eating foods with more calories.


Surgery may be used, but only a few patients benefit from these surgical treatments:


Surgery to remove parts of the diseased lung can help other areas (not as diseased) work better in some patients with emphysema


Lung transplant for severe cases

Support Groups


People often can help ease the stress of illness by joining a support group in which members share common experiences and problems.


See also: Lung disease - support group

Expectations (prognosis)


COPD is a long-term (chronic) illness. The disease will get worse more quickly if you do not stop smoking.


Patients with severe COPD will be short of breath with most activities and will be admitted to the hospital more often. These patients should talk with their doctor about breathing machines and end-of-life care.

Complications


Irregular heartbeat (arrhythmia)


Need for breathing machine and oxygen therapy


Right-sided heart failure or cor pulmonale (heart swelling and heart failure due to chronic lung disease)


Pneumonia


Pneumothorax


Severe weight loss and malnutrition


Thinning of the bones (osteoporosis)

Calling your health care provider


Go to the emergency room or call the local emergency number (such as 911) if you have a rapid increase in shortness of breath.

Prevention


Not smoking prevents most COPD. Ask your doctor or health care provider about quit-smoking programs. Medicines are also available to help kick the smoking habit. The medicines are most effective if you are motivated to quit.

Well I have a lot of sleepless nights.  I stress and worry over everything.  I still haven't quit smoking.  It's just to hard with everything that's going on.  I know I need to quit.  I've even questioned God as to why he hates me so much.  I don't know what I could possible do to make things right so that this curse (or what seems like one) to be lifted off of me.. I'm not a bad person.  I don't understand why I am going through so much and so many trials.  I help anyone I can.  It's driving me crazy not being able to work.  But, I have trouble with my breathing just walking up the stairs or down them even.  I can't sit in the car or anywhere long because of my back.  I have some depression going on.  I'm tired of taking medication.  But, I know I have to in order to make things easier on me.


Welp on April 6, 2012 I go to the Urologist.  I have no clue as to what they are going to do.  It will be my first meeting with them.

Well I got a denial letter from the Social Security Office.  So, I met with a lawyer on January 19, 2012.  So the lawyer filed all the necessary paper work on my behalf.  Time to get the appeal process going for a hearing. WOW I don't think they realize how serious this is.  Can you believe the Social Security Office lost my appeal papers?  The lawyer had to file them again.  So, now I have to wait even longer for a hearing... UGGH!

Well my back had been hurting me off and on for years.  It went out to the point where I couldn't walk and I just wanted to cry.  On March 2, 2012 my primary doctor ordered another x-ray of my lower lumbar.  The doctor got the results and met with me  on March 8, 2012.  He said he wanted to do an MRI just to make sure that what the x-ray showed was right.  So,  here I go more testing.  I went on March 9, 2012 for my MRI.  My wife had a doctor appointment on March 15, 2012.  The doctor told her that the MRI showed my back was messed up from  my lower lumber from my T-12 through my S-1 is also messed up.  I have approx 4-5 bulging discs that are pinching the nerves in my back.  If that wasn't bad enough the MRI also showed a mass in my right kidney.


So, my primary doctor ordered a multiphasic ct.  Multiphasic is where they run dye through you with an iv and you have to drink barium so they can see everything good.  Well heck.  On March 27, 2012 I met with a Neurosurgeon about my back.   She said my back looks great for my age other than the bulging discs and the pinched nerve.  She wants to try pain management and physical therapy first and use surgery as a last resort.  That's fine with me.  I surely don't want to be cut if we can help it.

Here's crossing fingers and saying prayers.

November 16, 2011 I had another test for my heart called a nuclear stress test.  It's where they give you medicine and then look at your heart the medicine kinda lights up the inside of your body so they can get a better view.  I was also put back on the treadmill.  My heart is great!

On November 17, 2011 I had an appointment with the Social Security Office about my SSI and SSD.   Now we wait and see what they say.  On November 21, 2011 I meet with my primary doctor so he can go over all my results.  I breathe a sigh of relief because it could be worse than what it is.  My heart is terrific my lungs not so much.. But, at least I can slow down the effects.  I can't reverse the damage to my lungs it's permanent.

I filed for Unemployment since I had worked so much in my life.  Of course they denied me because I didn't let the employer know ahead of time that my doctor was sending me to the hospital with me showing signs of a heart attack.  Sorry, I couldn't plan health problems around them!  On December 15, 2011 I have a appointment for a spirometer test that morning.  A spirometer is a  machine that you take a deep breath then blow into this tube.  It measures the amount of air you are actually releasing from your lungs.


My wife decided to set up eye appointments for our family just to make sure that our eyes were all fine and for the fact I had been complaining with mine bothering me.  So, on December 16, 2011 I go to the eye doctor and find out I need bifocals.  Ok so, apparently my eyes aren't that good either.... HMMM!   What's next???

The Beginning

        On October 24, 2011 I went to the doctor for what I thought was only a cold.  The doctor's office did an ekg on me and it showed I was having a heart attack.  I was given a nitroglycerin pill and an adult aspirin in the doctor's office while we waited for the ambulance to take me to the hospital.  I was terrified my wife was trying her best not to break down and cry and be strong for me.  On the way to the hospital the paramedics said I wasn't having a heart attack but gave me another nitroglycerin pill.  Once at the hospital I had a series of blood work done, along with more ekgs, an x-ray and a chest CT.  The doctor's didn't really like to keep me informed as to what was going on.  Which anyone would be frustrated being scared and not knowing the next step.  I laid in the hospital bed for over ten hours with nothing to drink or no iv fluids.  The ER doctor told me everything my blood, x-ray, ct scan, ekg all looked great.  

         Later we would find out different.  My wife called our primary care physician and asked for the results of the hospital tests.  That's when we found out about the Emphysema.  My wife immediately called and set up an appointment with a pulmonary doctor.  While my primary care doctor's office was scheduling a series of tests to make sure my heart was indeed fine.

         On October 27, 2011  I filed for disability. I have worked over 35 years of my life and not working is one of the hardest things that I thought I had to face.  On November 7, 2011 I had a treadmill stress test for my heart.  That test seemed fine.   So, on November 10, 2011 I had cardiac echo to make sure I didn't have a hole or something else going on with my heart.  I also met with my pulmonary physician on November 10, 2011 for the first time.

That was a day I will never forget.  My pulmonary Dr told me that according to my chest ct  I have Chronic Obstructive Pulmonary Disease (C.O.P.D). What C.O.P.D is the combination of chronic bronchitis and emphysema combined.  I also have asthma.  I also have a spot on my right lung.  I looked at my wife and she looked at me. With no words said we both could see the fear in each others eyes.

I have been smoking for over 30 years.  I'm bound and determined to quit but it's extremely hard after all these years.